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Critique on Importance of Child Vaccination

The positive include; easy presentation of the subject at hand, easy to read and understand. The ideas of the paper flow well from introduction to the subject at hand which is vaccination. The writer also presents proper background to vaccination and one can easily see why vaccination is important. The writer sets out the pros against the cons. The writer has also provided a citation for the readers that would like more information about the topic written about. The grammar uses easy to understand words and grammatical errors are few. The writer uses a Disneyland story which is attention grabbing to portray an important message of what could happen in a disease outbreak. Well written subheadings help the audience to follow on the ideas of the writer. The tone the writer uses with the audience is effective because it is formal and addresses the vaccination issue with the seriousness it deserves.

The negatives include a lack of titling the citation to alert the reader. Some sentences are unnecessarily long. The writer also uses an acronym (MMR) which is not written in full and assumes that the reader knows what it means. A proper memo structure is missing. The memo lacks a closing salutation.

Critique on: Houston Rockets-Critique on Importance of Child Vaccination

The positives are easy to understand word choice. It is brief. The writer explains complex words. The writer tries to break down the content with subheadings. In the introduction the writer attempts to let the director know what the mixed-method approach is all about. The tone adopted by the writer is official which is good because it addresses the senior accordingly.

The negatives are lack of punctuation marks were necessary, a proper memo structure is lacking. Some sentences in the introduction are too long. The longer sentences need to be split into two. The words ‘Because you asked how’ in the third paragraph of the introduction are unnecessary. The words ‘I wanted to send you this information’ are unnecessary because he is in the process of doing so. The writer should just go straight to the point. The writer should just go ahead and state how to improve sale techniques. Lack of good citation and no conclusion is provided. The write also uses a lot of (they, it and this) without clearly explaining what is in reference. The writer effectively shows the marketing director how the mixed-method approach helped in a different case. However, the writer does not provide a tie in to how the approach could be utilised in their own company for benefit. The writer has important ideas but they are not arranged in an easy to follow order. The memo lacks a closing salutation.Critique on Importance of Child Vaccination